High Point
I’ve learned that I can definitely be part of an active play without knowing the lines or backstories.
There’s probably only two people on earth that can get me to travel, let alone travel the week before Thanksgiving. It happened and I found myself on the east coast meeting the family and catching up on family get togethers that had nothing to do with me and who weren’t mine.
Funny thing - not my first rodeo. When it hits you that you’ve actually attended several functions where no one was related to you but somehow you still ended up being part of it and were obligated to stay until the end. The difference this weekend? I didn’t know a soul and they were all great company.
I found myself in two different settings. An intimate family gathering and a party. The gathering was so much different than what I grew up with. Our gatherings had a hundred people showing up for food and after a 3-day prayer you ate enough for renal failure and then said your goodbyes as music blasted throughout.
This gathering was different in that everyone knew each other well and there were one-on-one conversations of earlier conversations that had spanned decades. What I enjoy about Southerners? The ability to subtlety address a subject and continue on with your day.
[example of this weekend.]
Me: Yeah, she looks like she’s doing great. I’m glad it all worked out.
Relation: Windshield wipers are supposed to work, even if it’s not raining.
[example of my past get togethers.]
Me: Yeah, she looks like she’s doing great. I’m glad it all worked out.
Relation: Well, the mother was born out of wedlock so the granddaughter had no choice but to have the miscarriage. We all know, but we don’t talk about it because I heard it from my cousin who was outside the house when she got pregnant the second time. How much was your plane ticket? How did you pay for it?
It’s the nuances in any family dynamic that make it unique. From this gathering I ended up at a birthday party. Those two words can be triggers to anyone from my family or a similar one. It elicits burdens, cancerous tumors that grow for years, and angry moments wondering what you ever did in your life to ever garner having to shovel it all.
We pull up to the venue of this birthday party and say hello to everyone and head right in. There weren’t a hundred strangers loitering the parking lot. There weren’t miles of material to trip over in the hall or on the way to the bathroom. You simply walked in and headed to your seat while chatting with other guests.
After the meal was complete it was time to go. The time clocked was around two hours. Two hours and we were allowed to leave. Every guest there would have dialed 911 had they ever had to sit through the half day birthdays I’ve suffered.
[the convo after the meal.]
Me: That was really nice. We have to get pics at the set-up outside.
Shannon: It was nice.
Me: What’s next?
Shannon: Nothing.
Me: Do we have to do anything?
Shannon: No.
Me: Who do we give an envelope to?
Shannon: We don’t do that sort of thing, dumbass.
Me: I fucking love this country.
Due to the excitement of getting to walk outside immediately after the event and not be bombarded in the parking lot with people/questions/favors my taste of freedom was so sweet I forgot to take pics outside in my autumn dress. Next time.
